Mati Hidup.

Airmata aku berlinangan seperti musim hujan.
Musim hujan.
Hujan hari hari.
Begitu juga hati aku,
Airmata ku mengalir hari hari.
Mengapa?
Hati aku sakit.
Aku nak mati.
Mati dan pergi.
Pergi dari dia.
Itu yang dia nak.
Aku akan pergi.
Tapi macamana?
Macamana aku nak lupakan kisah cinta kita?
Macamana aku nak lupakan apa yang kita telah lakukan sesama?
Macamana?
Kau bagitau aku macamana.
Dan aku akan pergi.
Tapi lepas kau bagitau macamana.
Dan sebelum aku pergi.
Aku nak bagitau.
Mati hidup semula.
Kau tetap lelaki aku pilih.
Andai kata takde jodoh.
Aku bersumpah.
Aku akan cerita tentang sejarah cinta kita kat anak cucu aku.

Perfect.

I guess this is the end of us. I'm keep tried and tried to save this relationship. I keep begging to him for the changing in our relationship and he said I'm the who ruin our relationship. He even said if he tall our love story in front of the others, they will blame it on me too. You know what's more silly on my mind? I thought that we could have a babies together. I thought that we can prove to our parents that our love were not just a short-term love. Cry and blood is my bestfriend right know . I know, I hurt him so much. I let he down. He said to me 'Bila ada depan mata taknak hargai, jangan sampai suatu hari aku dah blah kau baru nak hargai'. Now, I know what that means. How can I tell him that he's everything I need? People around me keep saying that I'm going nuts. Yes, I am. It is a sin to loving him? If the answer is yes, you should talk in front of the mirror. Nobody's perfect. But he's perfect lover, ever.

Penyakit.

Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku,
Hati aku sakit,
Teramat sakit..
Betapa aku sedih, merana hingga hatiku sakit sangat.
Airmata ku tak pernah berkurangan untuk dia.
Impian 2tahun ku bekecai macam tuh saja.
Mengapa?
Mengapa dia yang aku pilih Ya Allah?
Mengapa dengan dia aku menjadi gila?
Mengapa aku sayang pada dia yang tak punya apa apa?
Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku,
aku merindui senyuman nya.
Bau nya.
Tangan nya.
Suara nya.
Telatah nya.
Ciuman nya.
Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku,
Adakah dia merindui ku seperti mana aku merindui dirinya?
Merindui dia adalah penyakit paling perit pernah ku alami.

Honey Beeeeee

 

I keep thinking. What I'll do without him. Can I have a man like him? Can I happy all of my life? Can I sleep without knowing what did he do right know? I don't know. I'm not srong enough. I miss you, my own taiko ):

Menyesal

School was fine. Like usual, I waited for Fyfa going home together. Then Yaya said Tasha was here. Tasha and Cha catch me up at school. Surprised -___-" Tasha was laughed at me like crazy. She said she never see me in uniform school. Whatever -__-'' Then I told him that I'm going to Cha's house. I lied to get his attention. Cha's called me asked to accompany Tasha buy a food and cigarette. I saw B. I wanna hug him as hard as i can. Bt mama was at amanda. Hmm. Tasha go to wellcome at I met I'm at Hotlink';s shop. I kissed him just for once ): I want more than once! He didn't look at my face. Can I cry now?